Separation & Divorce

Separation is a tremendously difficult time for all families, particularly when the break up was sudden or traumatic, and it is just as difficult for married parents as it is for parents who lived common-law. Parents must learn to cope with intense emotions following the loss of the relationship, while making the transition from life as part of a couple to life as a single person and a single parent. One of the most difficult jobs separating parents have is protecting their children from the parents' disputes.

Separation is also a difficult experience for children, who often do not understand what is going on between their parents and why their home life is changing in such a big way. This transition is even more difficult where children are exposed to the conflict between their parents.

When parents cannot agree about how the children will be looked after following separation, where the children will live most of the time and how much each parent will see the children, parents often turn to the courts, particularly when mediation will not help them solve these problems. Typically, parents want the courts to deal with issues like custody, guardianship, access and child support.

The courts are usually able to give separated parents an effective, permanent resolution of these issues, and create a parenting plan that both parents are relatively happy with and suits the needs of the children. Sometimes, often because parents cannot stop fighting with each other, nothing the courts can do will permanently settle things. Parents involved in this kind of conflict may find themselves going back to court, over and over, about little issues, somewhat important issues and very important issues.

Parenting coordination allows these disputes to be resolved under the consistent direction of a single, neutral professional as they arise, without the delay, expense and uncertainty of going to court. Parenting coordination is especially helpful for parents who have been to trial and still continue to have conflict with each other, despite having a permanent order about custody, guardianship and access.

Additional information about family law, arbitration, mediation and the court process can be found at these external websites:

JP Boyd's BC Family Law Resource: www.bcfamilylawresource.com
Legal Services Society: www.familylaw.lss.bc.ca
Provincial Government: www.ag.gov.bc.ca
Supreme Court of British Columbia: www.courts.gov.bc.ca
Provincial Court of British Columbia: www.provincialcourt.bc.ca
BC Arbitration and Mediation Institute: www.amibc.org
BC Mediator Roster Society: www.mediator-roster.bc.ca

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